Embrace Your Imperfections.

This week has been tough... it's been the type of week where I've felt stressed and have been overcritical of myself. Funnily enough, I needed to not only learn more about myself on a deeper level but to better myself. As a perfectionist, it is very easy to view our imperfections as problems we can't fix, and while it may be true, it shouldn't stop our progress.

I had a bucket load of assignments I needed to do, every Teams Software notification made my heart rate drop. I would break down just thinking that I couldn't do it which was disheartening, to say the least. Asides my tasks, I was fixated on the idea that I was behind in life (I know very deep). It dawned on me that there were things that I expected of myself at my age that I hadn't met yet. I was frustrated that I wasn't good at multi-tasking and was making slow progress.

It was this critical mindset which made me identify all my flaws and automatically conclude that I wasn't a good person. I know it seems absurd but it is the truth.

What makes you insecure? How important are people's impression of you?

These questions didn't spark a discussion, it just created pressure to be perfect and insisted that I knew all the answers which were not helpful. While it wasn't the best way to go about how I was feeling, it did get me thinking a lot about myself without any excuses or distractions from external factors.

It was when I listened to a podcast (@girlguidepodcast on IG) that I was reminded that 'no one has it all figured out'. This made me see things from a different perspective, after all, we are all struggling with something or trying to do better. The outcome of the podcast: A shift is on its way! I still felt pummelled by the long list but with a bolder approach to fight for control.

Conversations with mum,( who always give great advice) were "You either choose between letting the work rule or take control of the workload."

There was also an instance where she explained a habit I tended to have when it came to certain issues. It was a bitter pill to swallow, although that was never her intention at all, it was just a part of me that I really didn't like. I guess you could say that this past week I have had a love-hate relationship with myself and I was disliking a lot of things about me.

Ok, think of self-criticism as a way of bettering yourself and all you need to focus on is ensuring that criticism is constructive, not a hindrance.

ACTIVITY:

Journalling may not be an easier option for you but it does help- Make a list of your weakness and strength- see examples below.

Weakness: Habits, personal traits etc

Strength: Organisation, communication, problem-solving, optimistic, maturity, self-motivation and discipline

For every weakness counteract this with a corresponding strength - Let the games begin!

Tips for how to embrace your imperfections:

1. Accept you're imperfections.

I'm not suggesting you go looking for all your flaws but over time you'll start to notice things that you're not so good at. When you begin to see what they are just taking them as they are. It is in our nature to instantly change things that aren't right but sometimes with time wrongs become rights. Don't dramatically try to change who you are, just learn to be ok with your imperfections.

2. Don't compare yourself.

We are all different- completely different people just with things in common. What someone else is good at should not be an indication of what you are bad at. Nowadays, people become insecure about themselves because they compare their physical traits, personality or ability to someone else who they deem as better than them. No one is better or worse than you. A person may be more experienced than you but they are not any better.

3. Learn to love yourself.

This is easier said than done- I know. When I asked my mum 'if there was any part of her that she didn't like' she replied ' I love all of me'. This wasn't the answer I thought of but it resonated with me. She is not perfect- I believe no one is- but she loves herself enough (not in a vain way) to not dampen her excitement and enlightened attitude to life. This makes it difficult (maybe impossible lol) for anyone of the sought to tell her or convince her otherwise e.g. 'she is ugly', 'she is untidy' etc. When I heard this, it pulled on my strings, it encouraged me to work on my self-esteem and prioritise self-love.

You're not perfect and neither am I. This week has shown me both sides: letting my imperfections get the best of me or not allowing my imperfections to stop me from loving the rest of me. The choice is yours... which side will you be on?

Thank you for reading, let me know if you gave the activity a go and don't forget to comments what you learned.